Transcript
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Hello, I'm Rachel Richards and welcome to teenagers untangled the audio hug where we use research by experts and our own experience to discuss everything and anything to do with parenting teenagers.
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Hi, I'm Susie Asli mindfulness coach, mindful therapist and musician. I have three teenagers two of them are twins.
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As a parenting coach mother of two teenagers and two oldest stepdaughters.
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I've seen the transformative power of listening to how other parents work. We can feel supported, get fresh ideas. And even if we disagree, it helps us to think more clearly about the way we parent and why. So welcome. Pull up a chair. And let's begin. Now in this episode, we're going to talk about parties that Suzie please before we start, share with us what our lovely listener, Frankie said,
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yeah, really lovely review here. Thank you so much for all the research and time you put into this podcast, and all the others, it was so interesting and enlightening.
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It's encouraged me to challenge some of my internal thoughts around gift giving and my own expectations, you should be top of the podcast charts. I found you and my son started experiencing anxiety and listening to your podcast on that subject helped me so much, and how to approach it. And it worked. Thanks again.
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Oh, amazing.
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And you know, that anxiety podcast is one of the most downloaded of all of our so clearly it's a massive problem for so many payments. And it's I wasn't sure how well it had landed. So that's really great to
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hear. So I'm thinking we could maybe do a follow up on
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it, it's in the pipeline. This time, we're going to be talking about parties. But before that, I want to share my own golden nugget that was triggered by a conversation with an Asian father. Now he told me that the tradition in his culture demands that kids look after their parents, and that his wife has found the responsibilities overwhelming.
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She hates them so much, that she's brought her own sons up saying that they don't have to do anything for her. And their job is to live their lives free of that responsibility. The father's worry, of course, is that their sons now feel no sense of responsibility, and that they take everything she does for granted. And he thinks they're taking advantage of her.
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And it reminded me of our very first episode. And of course, I told him, Look, it's a classic response to an upbringing we hate, we try to fix the pain in ourselves by making sure our own kids don't have it. But the way we tend to do it is often extreme. So we don't help ourselves. And we don't really help our children. And you know, when I look at myself, and the way I respond, I know from experience that when I have a big response to something my teens are doing or saying, it's almost always because of my inner child reacting. So I tried to find time on my dog walks to dig into what's caused it. And once I can identify it, I can talk to my teams about why I behaved that way. And then we have power to manage it better.
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Interesting. I like that that's really, really interesting. And it's so true.
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Yeah, my nugget is it's the kind of the classic of what you're missing what you're lacking, then you get it. So, I mean, I really believe that we are responsible for the tone that we set as the adults even though we've got almost adults ourselves, and they're not great. We are responsible for the tone that we bring. And I think sometimes if we're tired, if we're lacking in other areas, we kind of I think we become very reactive, don't we and ping pong. And I had a I had a morning this morning, in fact, where there was lots of things yesterday, and you know, and just a little tiny 2% stress here, 2% stress here, 2% stress there, and suddenly, you're at full capacity. And I knew I could feel it. Because I that's how I work, you know, I could feel I needed to do what I do the tools that I have, and can bring myself back into balance.
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And then there was just another one that came, you know, my one of my teenagers hadn't got up for it. And it was like, ah, and I could feel it happening. So I took myself off after we it was all sorted and fixed. And then the problem itself had resolved I took myself off for a really long run and sat and meditated and myself back into where I need to be and then I can set the tone. And I could you know be there for my daughter. I could do what I needed to do.
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But I don't know we have to take responsibility for how we are.
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Yes. And I love that because it reminded me of a conversation I heard about micro stressors when we get up in the morning. There's a text we've got, oh, I didn't deal with that. And then there's in a an email and these little things that they're in themselves and nothing but you get to a certain point in the day where somebody says something and it might normally be something you can cope with. But because your stress cup is so full Yeah, just lose it.
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Yeah, it's that window of tolerance. You know, if you're if you're out of your window of tolerance and the more we practice being aware, the more we practice mindful awareness. The more Are we know when we're at the edge? bring ourselves back?
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Yes, absolutely brilliant. Love that. Right now parties. We wanted to have a look at the tips that we can come up with for hosting a party talking to your teenager about going to her party, because it's coming up a lot. And also it's party season. And we mentioned this idea on social media. And we had this wonderful response from Little Miss thinker who said she used to have a friend whose mother said they could have parties but had to choose between boys or booze. Everly Susie, come on, which one would you choose?
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As a teenager?
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Oh, my goodness, that's hilarious. As a teenager,
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oh, I would have chosen boys the same chain.
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And you know, they will say, Well, you could just sneak booze in anyway.
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Yeah. Yeah. But I was never daunted by the booze. So for me, it definitely would have been the boys. Funny, it's a funny one to give you a teammate. And then if you actually say to you, I've got girls who I say to the girls, you know, would you like a party? It's just not a party.
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It's just girls. Now when they were younger, for sure, that's a party. But you know, at a teenage years, it's not really a party without no other sex.
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Some of them use the term gathering, don't they?
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Yeah, even then. Yes, it would.
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That wouldn't be classified as
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well. One of the things I research said that when they call it a small gathering, that's what kids call parties when they want you to think that it isn't a party.
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Yeah. So anyway, in a way, I haven't kind of come up with a very specific definition of what a party is. But I think what we'll focus on here is something where you're actually there's a form, there's some form of invitation to a party. So your your teenager comes to you and says, either, I'd love a party, I want to have a party, or I want to go to this party. Yeah.
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Because that's likely, yes, there's the gatherings that you can get, they're slightly different, that some of this stuff does apply. So thinking it through could help you consider whether you would want the gathering to take place in your house without actually having a few ground rules. And having talked it through with your teenager, because again, this can creep up on us content.
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Yeah. And I
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think that is actually key and just, you know, thinking about this topic, and discussing it with you a bit beforehand, is already making me think and and knowing that, you know, if you don't have those ground rules in your head beforehand, then then it's really difficult. So it's really helpful to know what what are your what's your grandma's? What your non negotiables?
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Yeah, and it's always to do with parenting is, what happens is these things creep up on us before we really had time to think it through.
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And then suddenly, you're confronted with, I've got to make this decision. So that's my first tip, which is take your time, if they come to you. And they say, I either want to go to this party, or I want to host a party, you don't have to answer immediately. They may want to put pressure on you. But it's you can use your within your rights to say I needed a little bit of time to think about it.
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Step back and think, Okay, where do I sit with this? And what what's important to me, and I think what we should do is go through hosting your own party, because this the things you have to consider when you're hosting your own party are things that someone else is having to consider. And if it will then inform the questions that you ask if you are sending your teenager to another party. And of course, it really is age dependent.
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Yeah, and child dependent and child depend because I have I mean, I have three children, and they're really different. And they're really different socially as well. So I think, my younger boy, and I'm pretty sure he's never going to listen to this, because he's told me here, they're gonna listen to him.
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He's much more sociable, so his parties will be different from my eldest, my eldest has had a party and it was, you know, it was it was really fun. It was lovely party. But yeah, it was will be different with this one.
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Yeah. And, and also, so for example, let's say they're 1718. That's a rather different age group to 1314. So we're talking about a massive age range here. But it's a 1718 year old who hasn't been going to parties. It's also about how much experience have they got in troubleshooting and how you deal so you know, obviously, just think about the child that you have. And we've all got, you've got three different children.
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One of them's nearly 18, you know, he's nearly an adult. So, you know, me asking him, some of the questions is like, well, it's his stuff now.
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And he wouldn't tell me that, you know,
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let's just think that's a bit weird, right?
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So your child comes to you said, I want to have a party. So there are key things First of all, to say, Okay, you go away and plan your party, and come to me with your ideas, and I'll have my own ideas and let's have a conversation about it. So you can get them to come up with their best case scenario. You think about your best case scenario or your worst case scenario and and then somehow you can make negotiation so the key things are number of guests knowing who who these people are? Do you care about having names, and being clear that if they're not on the list, they're not coming in. And there's a reason for this. And we'll come on to that. Having your teenager in terms of invitations, the reason why it's worth having a list, and it's worth knowing that the kids can't come in if they're not on the on the list is because it's also to do with traceability, and safety. So what I mean by that is, if you're, if you don't have a number to call and something goes wrong, then you're going to really be no problem. Yeah, so it's critical. You can say to a teenager, I need to know who these people are, if something goes wrong, I need to be able to have someone to contact because there's a parent at the end of that,
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yeah, it's tricky, isn't it? I think it's I think it's really valid and really important for safety. I'm just thinking of, you know, scenarios, you know, really good mate, comes along and has another really good mate with them. And, you know, I would probably say, come in.
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And that happens. So we'll come on to that, because there was a lady who had hosted a party. And that happened, where she said, right, you have to be on the list to come in. And people were bringing their girlfriends or they were tired, they just assumed that somebody else was allowed to come. And if you're okay with that, well, that's okay. But you need to know that.
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And you also need to know the ramifications, which we'll come on to. So you need to know who the people are. We need to talk about alcohol, vaping smoking drugs. So you need to be clear with your teenager, about both how you feel about those things, the age range that that there is and what how you will tackle it if it happens. So I've had conversations with a parent who said, I've got all the drugs, I don't care, which I find really not in my house. And then I'm that parent who if I found someone taking drugs in my house, I'd call their parents Yeah, please come and collect them. That's not okay. They wouldn't be in the house. So you need to be very clear and spirits, you know, at what age are you comfortable with spirits being in the house, again, because teenagers are stupid.
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And their job is to take risks and to do things that are fun.
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And they may think that that would be great, but that normally, they're the people who when they're drunk, the spirits are then vomiting all over your house,
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and it comes all the way down to your connection with your kid does does everything does if you have a respectful, generally respectful, of course, we all lose our tempers and all of that, but a generally respectful relationship and a good connection with your teenager, you can talk about the hard stuff as well, then you can have a respectful conversation and explain, actually, you know, in this house, I don't want this or I do want this, this is okay, this isn't okay, whatever your own values are. And then hopefully, they'll you know, they'll respond to that they're respected, they won't want to, you know, mess stuff up, they won't want to it, that doesn't mean that things won't happen, and that they don't get caught up in the moment and their mates are doing stuff. But the fundamental baseline will be that they're on board.
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Yeah, yeah. And I think having this conversation with them, and being clear about it gives them a chance to be able to say to other teenagers, so this is how it is at home and blame you, for example, because one of the big problems is that they are also much more prone to being led by other people. And they may not have the strength or the ability to spot that something's about to go horribly wrong, or that their friends are doing things that they shouldn't really be doing. And so stop them. Yeah. So you need to sort of just flag these things up. So they can think them through beforehand and say, How are we going to deal with this?
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I've also I think, which is an important thing to think about is, is that my eldest had a party it was it was really fun. It was lovely, nothing bad happened. But he found it quite stressful.
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Another friend of mine had, they had a you know, they had a party, and they found it stressful. So it's worth kind of bearing that in mind. You know, is it was a bit of a cure. It was like we're not in that game.
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Brilliant. We had a kind of small party went really well, there were only a couple of tiny weeny incidents. And Dan tick the box
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is interesting, because my older daughter had a party this summer, and it was fantastic. Now, I don't know if all the guests thought it's fantastic because I refuse to have spirits. And I think some of them were like, Oh, that's a bit lame. But actually, as it happened, it seemed it seemed that everybody had a good time.
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And she was stressed is this, this is gonna, you know, it's got to be a good party. And I kept saying to her, you know, what, if they come and they're not having a good time, honestly, we have all this lovely things set up here. It's their responsibility. And that's one of the things that we can teach our teenager that actually it's not on you to provide these teenagers with a good time you provide them with a venue. Yeah.
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And it's their own personality that's going to dictate whether this is
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I think the stress can be to the elements they can't it can be whether your friends are having a good time.
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So obviously that's important to the teenagers. You know, if you've thrown a good party or a really lame one that doesn't look good. But also the stress of oh gosh, what if something goes wrong? Yeah, break things or you You know, if something goes goes goes wrong, that's stressful. And I don't think they really think that through and to do lists standing in their own home going, Oh, my God.
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And that yeah, no, that's absolutely right. And that has concerned my kids, and they don't want parties because of that, because they're scared about the house being damaged.
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And on that note, we have to set ground rules for them, for example, where are they allowed to go in the house? Which rooms are out of bounds, locked doors, which shouldn't be opened? And whether you allow smoking or baby in the house or not? I'd say no, but because again, that's a doorway into all sorts of other issues.
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And I think if we, if we talk to the teenagers, not just our own, but their friends, and we talk to them, you know, with the presumption that they're lovely, and they're respectful, and they're welcome in our homes, you know, and just explaining, I mean, when when Weinstein had a party, my daughter was at home, me and my daughters, kind of hid in my bed with my laptop watching some rubbish. It was really fun. And, um, and just, I explained to them, Well, you know, please, please don't come into these rooms. You can use the loo upstairs, but that's it, you know, try and use the one downstairs and they were all you know, you're welcome. But this is our home, and we're going to be up here. They were all like, oh, yeah, of course. No worries.
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Yeah, yeah. And again, it's not an hour. And then they hate you. Yeah, it's about mutual respect. So we have to be enter into the spirit of it. So coming on to the party invitations, do not, in any circumstance, let your child create a group Snapchat. Because what can happen is they can then teenagers love to tell everyone on my back to have a great search. And then and then forward the information. And then the other people will assume that they've been invited. Yeah. And this is really quite pertinent. Because again, one of the people I research said that as a result of Snapchat and being used, people started turning up to the party, and it had been what they call broadcast, is that the map thing? It's the map. So so this is the other thing, when when kids turn up to the party, you have to say, please turn off your snap map. Yeah. Because it's because people spot congregations of people on the snap map, and they go up party, and very often the people who do that are older. Right? So they're not actually, you know, your kids may be I don't know, 1314 15. You know, the ones who are thinking or just go to that party, they're unlikely to be 12 year olds, it could be but then.
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So you may have a much more difficult time trying to eject them from the party or stop them from getting in. And this one lady had to call the police and the police had to then keep patrolling, because once it's broadcast, people will keep turning up throughout the night and service maps,
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that's really important. Well, yeah, we use snap Master, I think they're weird. And they're kind of handy sometimes when I don't know when one of my particular kids is always off with his mates. So I guess it's better to go where, where's the look on his snap maps.
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So you also you want to include your contact details on any invitation, because you want the other parents to be able to call you should they want to, and make it clear on the invitation that you will be providing all food and drinks so they don't feel that they have a right to bring extra things. So it just says like, well, we will have, they will so on the day of the party, lock away all your own spirits, all your valuables in a part of the house, you know that the guests can't get to including spare keys, hide them, because you don't want you know, who knows what could happen because kids can play games and mess around hydro keys, whatever. So just hide anything that you feel is valuable. And again, when they, the kids arrive, the friends arrive, explain the ground rules to the kids when they arrive.
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And you don't have to be this kind of fists on on your hips.
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But you do have to get out of by the way, just remember, and I'll take all your coats and your bags, so just do it in a very gentle way and they sell 90 My bag just went nuts. Okay, well put the bags upstairs, they'll be safe. Because what happens in particularly this woman's party, two of the girls bought vodka in their bags. And then they were the ones who were vomiting an hour later and crying. And so it's worth just greeting them at the door. So they say, Oh, I bought a present for your child.
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You say That's lovely. What a How kind of you and take it don't let them give it to the child because it probably will be alcohol. Oh, you just say it will open it as a family tomorrow. It's you know, it's very, very sweet for you. Thank you. Because young people are devilishly clever.
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And they don't realize it's the whole spirit thing, isn't it? They don't realize that you know how strong they are and exactly, it'll make exactly.
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And so when you're talking to your teenager about it, don't say I'm trying to shut down the fun. No, I've got these drinks. The thing is that spirits are it's so easy to go for things to go horribly wrong very, very quickly, which is why they're such an issue
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and they drink them really quickly and then they don't feel the effect immediately. So they take them off. Yes,
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yes. And it can be dangerous. Things not very nice. And if it gets to wives preloaded, you have to make a decision. Do I allow them in? Do I call the parent? You know, is it something where I'm okay to say, Look, you come and sit with me until you've calmed down a bit. Because if they come already very drunk, they're just going to get more drunk. And that's just going to cause more problems. Let me make you put out masses of food, whatever you think is the amount of food double it because the boys at some point are going to need it.
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Yeah. And it takes up the alcohol.
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My son's been to some parties where it particularly I mean, it sounds awfully sexist, isn't it? But particularly, it's a girl throwing the party and he says, like him and his mates by midnight, they are starving. And like, there's no food. Like, where's the bread? Where's the pizza?
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Yeah, so all we get lots of carbohydrates. Not salty, the salty stuff. The problem with that is that it makes them drink more, and lots of water, lots of soft drinks, because they will, you know, this woman said, basically, an entire loaf of bread disappeared apples, all the apples when just any food, just put food out and and if they're hungry, they'll eat it. and soft drinks, they will drink soft drinks, they'll drink soft drinks and buy multiple bottle openers, you don't want one bottle opener, either a bottle so and attach them with strings to things so that people can find them.
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Right. And in terms of the gatecrashers, we've already mentioned this, if things start to feel a bit uncomfortable, you know, you've got older kids turning up or people you suddenly realize, call the police sooner rather than later.
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And know that there's a chance that things can get broadcast.
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And this lady said that she would always have at least one parent in an in a household. And next time, she would have a burly a much bigger burly guy, because it just makes a difference in terms of dealing with some but it does problematic gas. Yeah, keeping kids safe. So this is, again, be in subtle attendance. Just remember that if you're the parent, and something really catastrophic happens, like son child dies or something, you know, you are going to be liable. So you do have to be aware, you can think it's really fun until it's not. So forgive yourself if something happened on your watch. So saying to your teenager, you know what, I just need to know that this is not going to happen, because it's not, it's no fun.
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You don't have to be weird and sit in the lounge room.
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Turn the TV on. You can you know, hideaway upstairs, but you just be on the premises.
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And just be aware that if there are bedrooms that they have access to you run the risk that the younger kids could be doing things in there that you don't want to do. So you need to sort of be have somebody just generally patrolling and making sure that there are no locked doors and areas where they shouldn't be.
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You know, some people would leave condoms out? I don't know.
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But you know, you just need to think about the audience that you have and make decisions based on that choices. Yeah, yeah. Regularly scan the house.
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Now when we talk about that.
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It's hiding alcohol in the hedges in the hatches. Are they nice fun places where they tend to hide them in our dishwashers, fridges, washing machines, ovens. So just to have a look, just
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turn your oven on exactly.
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If you find something, don't make a fast, just just confiscated, take it away. And then you know that it's fine.
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I can give it to them as they're leaving. If if
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if they turn up and they've got a bottle of vodka, you just say, Oh, sweetie, I'll keep this and you can have it just go back with your parents. When you go home.
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And let the sensible you you can spot the sensible ones, there might not be none. But if you see a spent sensible one, you can say, look if anything's at any point just coming, let me know. And I'll do something to I'll intervene. But I'll do it quietly so that nobody knows you said something. Yeah, right. Get those people on your side.
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And most of them are the most of them. Most teenagers, I think most teenagers are lovely. They just, it can just get out of hand quickly,
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it can get out of hand quickly. And once people are drinking, they're not really thinking. And you know, those years there, they it's so much fun. And they've been so locked down a lot of these kids that actually it can just be a desire to let off steam and then they don't realize that what they've done is they broken all your things, or the risk
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part of their brain as we know isn't fully exactly you know, they're gonna do stupid things and think that, you know, jump out of a tree when they're a bit drunk. You know, they don't think it through to all because they can't.
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Yes. And so when once again when you're talking to your teenager about having a phone number of the parents. I know I've had some raised eyebrows. There's a reason this is so so important.
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And that is if something goes wrong, you need someone to call and I had a party here where one of the kids hurt himself and it was it was marginal. So we've tried to use The steri strip to fix it, one of the parents said, I was like call the parent I said, Well, maybe I should call the parent because it's my job to make sure this person is safe, and they're not safe. And so this has happened. And the parent was so pleased that I contacted her she came in took him into a&e so that he could get it so that you know, these things happen. You just need to be able to call the parent instead,
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your own kid, you want to be able to go and help them. It's a funny one, it's really made me think this part of it, because I think, you know, with the younger ones, yes, I think I kind of know most of their friends, possibly not all of them. But you know, you get a general idea. So I've got lots of the numbers anyway. And that wouldn't be that wouldn't be an issue. But when they get older, I mean, I don't know who half my eldest friends are used to college where there's not that parental thing anymore. So then it's then it's not relevant. It's a different question. So it's the younger guys.
00:25:52.289 --> 00:26:23.609
I agree. I agree. Now, so coming on to your teenager wanting to go to a party questions or things, again, it depends on the age group, it really depends. And if they've come to you and said that they'd like to go to this party, and they're being honest about it, we'll give them credit for that and be grateful that you've got an teenager who's talking to you, and they're not just going to disappear off and say they're going around to their mates hat and suddenly that you find out they're at a party, you know, the other side of town. And just check in with them. And say, you can say things like, Are there going to be adults there is that alcohol?
00:26:23.640 --> 00:26:29.700
So when they're younger, you want to know this stuff, all the stuff we've been talking about.
00:26:26.009 --> 00:26:41.730
And you can say that I mean, for me, even with my 1718 year old bonus daughters, it was things like, What time does that party finish? Here's when we want you home? Here's because it's more about me feeling uncomfortable.
00:26:41.730 --> 00:26:42.119
Yeah.
00:26:42.420 --> 00:27:13.829
Yeah. And when we answer questions like that, I think it's really important to if they're being honest and giving you answers that are a little bit, you know, controversial, or you don't like them, that that doesn't immediately then mean, well, if that's the case, then this if that's the case, because then they won't share them, they're not going to share. No, no, you have to want to make really, really careful dance between we want them to give information and be you know, open, open to the answers and be reasonable and understanding because otherwise, they'll just
00:27:13.829 --> 00:27:26.700
lie. So I think when you're talking to them about it, it's about saying so I just want to know, so that we've talked this through so that you know how to cope if something goes wrong. So you know what, how are you going to get to and from the party? What's the safe option? And
00:27:26.700 --> 00:27:43.950
then the classic, you know, if if you're feeling uncomfortable, whatever the time is, whatever, wherever you are, you have a signal between each other, whether it's, you know, a case or whatever comes up in your phone, I will ring you, you can and I'll get you out, no questions asked. Brilliant, they feel safe.
00:27:44.430 --> 00:28:07.049
And the thing about alcohol again, because my kids have said they know how I feel about alcohol, I think it's great if you want to enjoy alcohol at a certain age, and I've just said look, just drink some water. You know, eat food, make sure that you just you have an idea of what what how much you've drunk so that you don't get vulnerable. And that's just about safety.
00:28:07.079 --> 00:28:19.259
Yeah, amazing, really, how many of them just think presume that that is the coolest thing they can do. And it is really fun. I'm not saying it isn't. But it's it's such a weird, but I
00:28:19.259 --> 00:29:59.819
think that that's a cultural, particularly in England, and I don't know what it's like in a lot of other countries. And I know people, we've got overnight people in 90 countries listening to us. So some of those countries are dry countries. But in England, there's this very strange culture of of getting completely drunk. And I've always hated it, I got a lot of pressure when I first started work, you know, our team had to go down to the bar, and everybody was supposed to get blind drunk, and I can't stand that it's not the way I function. And so I think and it's in all the cards, and it's, it's a very strange thing in my mind. And so the kids do absorb that. And they do think, well, that's how you have a fun party discussing it. So just say, well, don't you think is a bit weird? And that's the only way that people seem to think they can have fun because it doesn't make any sense. Sometimes it is fun, but sometimes it's not. So if you've got a situation where you are having a disagreement with your teenager, right, so you've they've said I want to do this and use thought actually that I'm not comfortable with that. The way to do it is to identify what is the problem here? You know, we don't agree on something. What is it we don't agree on? Like you, I want you to go to a party and have fun, but there's something here identify exactly what the problem is. Think about why it's a problem. So who's got the problem? And why is it a problem? brainstorm together the possible solutions, evaluate whether those solutions work, and then agree. Yeah, and the reason I talk about this step process, this five step process is that it's really helpful as just a technique for learning how to resolve problems, full stop, but it's also about building their awareness that you're on their side and you
00:29:59.819 --> 00:30:30.869
can come to you with stuff is actually really good opportunity as all these things are to build bridges with your kids and teach them how to discuss stuff because you're not going to agree on all of it have nots, that would be weird. Like, but there's an opportunity to say, okay, these are my non negotiables. What are yours? How can we work this out? Can we work it out? Maybe we can't. But let's have a an adult conversation about it, where we're not shouting at each other and freaking out, but we're having a proper discussion about it. I think it's brilliant learning tools.
00:30:31.019 --> 00:30:33.960
Absolutely. So I that's pretty much it.
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Anything else you
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want? Have a nice party.
00:30:39.329 --> 00:30:47.490
I mean, the truth is, some of us really, I love giving parties I always have done and my kids don't seem to want parties, which is really painful for me.
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I can come and throw in a mine.
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I mean, they want to go to them, but they don't want to host them because I think they just it is stressful. And it's there's so much pressure, as you said, they're getting there. They're slowly getting there. They're starting to come actually.
00:31:04.440 --> 00:31:13.230
One of my younger ones is that what kind of him he went to reek? Thought he was a really cool party. Can I have a party? And I did the Think about that. Yeah, we'll discuss it.
00:31:13.259 --> 00:31:17.579
Well done. Many we'll have one at some point, but we need to discuss it. We'd love
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to hear all of your stories and questions, so don't hesitate to get in touch.
00:31:19.319 --> 00:31:29.279
If you've enjoyed this episode, then why not help other parents, tell your friends, tell the school subscribe to our podcast.
00:31:25.410 --> 00:32:03.990
I just put it in here. I noticed that on our apple podcasts, only 30% of the people who are actually listening to it, download it, or follow us. So there's a huge number of people who aren't so if you are if you'd like it obviously if you don't like it don't believe you do like it subscribe and then you know it helps other people find us and it also means you'll never miss an episode. You can sign up to receive all of our latest news at our website where there's a blog reviews links to every episode and easy ways to contact us suppose Susie has her own email address.
00:32:04.259 --> 00:32:10.259
Oh, my website is www mindful hyphen life.co.uk.
00:32:10.559 --> 00:32:25.650
And just reiterating what you just said. I think it's always amazing to get feedback when we like it. We don't like it. That seems great leading up good discussions and things you want to know more of even if even if you think it's an awkward question, do it anonymously. Oh, well. We've
00:32:25.650 --> 00:32:32.220
had some tough to hear. We've had some really great suggestions coming up guys. That's it for now.
00:32:32.430 --> 00:32:33.180
Goodbye now.
